Inside The Mind
by mrpadfoot
Summary: Rogue and Gambit like each other, but Rogue's not going to tell anyone that, until it all comes out in a Danger Room session. Rogue fights Remy's inner demons and Remy struggles for his life after Rogue and his mishap. Just read it. I promise to finis
1. The Danger Room

A/N: I love messing with Rogue and Gambit's heads its so much fun. This, as usual, is a mixed timeline, enjoy. (Written in accents)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own X-men. X-men was made in 1963, I wasn't born until 1989. If I did invent them I'd be a pretty gifted -26 year old.  
  
Gambit was being a jackass. Of course what else could you expect from someone like him, Remy LeBeau was a jackass, a showoff, an idiot, and his grammar was enough to make Rogue twinge. He was, in her opinion, the characterization of stupidity. But every so often Rogue caught herself watching the fight in the danger room below.  
  
In the control room that loomed above the Danger Room's floor sat all those who weren't fighting. Rogue was sitting with a copy of Dracula opened, her legs crossed, Storm was watching intently, but like Jean, Logan, Shadowcat, Havok, and Cyclops they all knew the outcome. In a fight with no powers, no weapon and no rules, Remy was going to come out on top. Because Gambit never played by the rules and had grown up on the other side of the law, let alone the other side of the tracks. Needless to say there were a lot of knees to groins, elbows to heads, and long legs colliding with stomachs.  
  
Rogue looked over the rim of the thick red book to see Bobby go flying backwards his breath coming out in a huge puff of steam.  
  
"Mercy! I'm out! Quit it!" Bobby breathed struggling to get his words out. He shook his head vigorously.  
  
"Look' like I win again," shouted Gambit to the control tower. "'s'matter wit' you people?" He threw his arms out to the side, "Come on, I wanna challenge!"  
  
"Why aren't we allowed to use our powers anyway? I know Remy and by the time this is over o with we're going to need a hell f a lot of ice to bring his head back to usual size." Storm rolled her eyes at the Cajun. Rogue could already see his head swell she smiled secretly, " Plus in a real fight I'm pretty sure we'll be able to use them."  
  
"Not necessarily," Scott answered, Gambit and Iceman were coming back up to the control room, "you could be at a disadvantage in a battle and our powers could be useless."  
  
"Plus, it's great for you to realize dat ya don' know not'in' 'bout a real fight." Gambit and Bobby had joined them. Iceman fell into one of the chairs wiping blood from his streaming nose. His blond hair was disheveled and the expression on his face was so pathetic it was comical. "So who's nex'?" Gambit asked casting his gaze around.  
  
Rogue rolled her eyes and went back to her book. But she was listening at the same time. She didn't really know why. There was something unexplainable about his presence. Something.  
  
"Alright I let de next guy use 'is powers? It'll make it mo' interestin' for me."  
  
Rogue smiled to herself and removed on of the black gloves she wore to protect the rest of the world from her powers. "You exceptin' all competitors, Gambit?" She slipped her glove back on again still hiding behind her book.  
  
His red and black eyes turned to her, one light brown eyebrow raised, "you kiddin' Chere?" he asked, a smirk was starting to pass over his lips. "I meant guys really."  
  
"Your afraid of me, aren' you?" Asked Rogue.  
  
"Non I ain't scared o' you Marie, jus' I don' wanna hurt you." Remy was now all out snickering.  
  
Oh he hit a nerve. Marie. She hadn't gone by that name in a very long time, since before she had come to the institute. "You won't, 'cause you just said ah could use my powers." She smiled shutting the book putting it down on the control table, looking up into those red and black eyes. Something flashed across the glowing irises, fear?  
  
The other team members watched in astonishment with wide eyes. "Guys, I don't think this is such a good idea," said Jean slowly "Someone could get really--"  
  
"Okay, Chere yo' on, but don' say I didn' warn you." Gambit said pulling on his trench coat that was sitting in one of the chairs next to Storm. The shadow of fear or whatever other emotion she had caught in glistening in those eyes was gone, back to the cocky air that lay about him so naturally.  
  
As soon as Gambit and Rogue disappeared into the elevator Wolverine looked over at the others, "Who do ya' think its gonna be?" He asked, "I'm puttin' ten bucks on Rogue."  
  
"Logan we are not betting!" Said Jean looking angry, "this is a training exercise, which shouldn't even be happening, and in my opinion! And--"  
  
"7 dollars on Rogue!" shouted Havoc. "Or anything to shut Phoenix up." Jean looked very upset about being interrupted twice in one Danger Room session she sat down quietly, her eyes narrowed and her Phoenix power made her glow an angry red.  
  
"'Ey X-folk le's get dis show on de road before de comba'ants die o' old age!" Yelled Gambit toward the speakers.  
  
Cyclops hit the microphone button and called down to them, "jeez Remy keep your shirt on, start in 10."  
  
Rogue watched as Gambit's face became set and calm, but a slight twinge of some odd feeling stayed braking through that expert cool. Rogue couldn't place the problem. "9."  
  
He was loose, ready, like so many countless fights he had gotten into on the Bayou. Rogue was just another competitor, just another person who was pissed to find a priceless family heirloom missing, another Assassin in the warring Guilds bent on taking out Jean-Luc's son. But he knew she wasn't. Something was affecting Remy, breaking the professionalism he stuck to in fights, something that generated an emotion he wasn't used to, and it was Rogue. Something about Rogue.  
  
"8."  
  
Scott was taking a really long time counting down. Or maybe it just felt like a long time to her. She was watching him, reading Gambit the only way you could, through his eyes. She watched the red and black dance and pulsate slowly as time was slowed down.  
  
"7."  
  
It was a bizarre feeling; he could see those two green orbs watching him reading him as if he was one of her gothic novels. He could feel his hand twitch reflexively as if open his bo-staff.  
  
"6."  
  
He was sweating, he was scared. Scared of her. But she no longer wanted him to be scared of her. This was payback for all the stupid things Gambit had said over the past few months. Sure he was the new 'X' and that was hard but she hadn't been annoying.  
  
"5."  
  
"Come on Sco', ya' pain in de ass." Gambit shouted. It was bad enough that Scott was his roommate and corrected his English, but he didn't have to be counting this slowly.  
  
"Move over!" they heard Storm shout from somewhere inside the control room, Scott's dark form was pushed out of the way and the thin female form of Ororo Monroe, "4, 3, 2, 1! FIGHT ALREADY!" 


	2. Love is blind and Stupid

A/N: I've corrupted another normie to join the X-men fans. WEEE more mutants and comic book geeks!  
  
She braced herself. Remy didn't move. He still stood in defensive pose bouncing slightly, his full weight on his back foot. "What're you waitin' for?" asked Rogue curiously.  
  
"I ain't gonna hit 'cha. I'm a gentleman, I ain't gonna hit a girl least not firs'." He said, not relaxing at all.  
  
"Gentleman? Ah can think of a lot of words to describe ya' but gentleman most certainly isn't one of them." She dove at him, Gambit stepped to the side and she landed on the floor.  
  
"Jus' like an Assassin back 'ome. Damn I gotta lot o' memories fightin' people who battle like dat. I guess you ain't as good a fighter as you are a depress' teen. "  
  
Rogue pulled herself to her feet. "Fight me for real then if ah'm such an easy opponent."  
  
"Okay," he shrugged, "its yo' funeral."  
  
She was going to respond, but before she could Gambit had dropped kicking her ankles. Wham! He didn't hurt her, the floor did that.  
  
"Ready to try again?" Remy said offering Rogue his hand to help her up, "You ain't out unless you wanna give up, which migh' be de smarter choice."  
  
Two small feet came up and met his midsection. This time the wind was knocked out of Gambit. He fell back, after a few seconds struggled to talk, "not bad." He jumped to his feet panting, "not bad at all."  
  
Rogue jumped to her feet, throwing out her fist to hit him. He caught her fist and stepped to the side a foot came around and knocked her back ankle so she lost balance. She watched Gambit turn upside down, then the ceiling.  
  
"You wanna call it quit' River Rat?" He said hovering over her smirking.  
  
"I've still got one more trick up my sleeve, LeBeau!"  
  
"No you don' jus' stay down." Remy grinned turning toward the door, "yo' lost an' I even let you use yo'--"  
  
"Powers?" asked Rogue.  
  
"Righ'," Gambit turned around nervously. There was Rogue. She watched his eyes widen as she wound his arms around his neck.  
  
"'Night Gambit," she whispered. Then she closed the gap between them. Their lips met but she was kissing him with all of the pent up feeling that she had felt for him, and he was kissing her back with just as much emotion. He had wound his arms around her waist. It was so strange. It was like nothing she had ever experienced; this kiss was filled with passion, a feeling that she didn't understand. She could feel his energy draining. Rogue could feel Gambit's knees bend the lips on her own begin to fall back. Slowly Remy fell back one knee under him the other straight out in front. His eyes closed.  
  
But she didn't feel like she was there anymore. 18 years of images and memories flew in front of her in a few seconds. Gambit's images.Gambit's mind. she was lost in his mind. Rogue ran.  
  
"Oh my god!" It was Kitty's voice but it was so far away from her. Other sounds were cutting Kitty short; she was filled with the buzz of a thousand and one words spilling forward from countless mouths.  
  
"Rogue you shouldn't have--" it was Phoenix's voice but it died away in the ocean of words that she felt like she was sinking in. Rogue was blind to the rest of the world it was like a film was playing in front of her eyes and she was surrounded by the blackness of a movie theater. The movie played too fast and out of focus. Every second the man behind the projector fixed it a little more, the sounds were clearer and she fell forward into the movie screen.  
She was out of the Danger Room, she was out of the school, she wasn't even sure she was in New York anymore. She stumbled forward in the darkness trying to find a place to wait out a storm she had never before weathered. 


	3. Empty Shell

It was cold. It was dark. He felt exhausted. He could feel a foamy ground pressing against his spine, but that was all. He couldn't feel anything people are supposed to feel. He was empty, totally empty. No emotion, no memory not even the feeling of his heart beating inside of his chest.  
  
"Oh my God!" It was Kitty; he could feel the vibrations of the 14-year- old's voice reverberating through the floor and his body. He was just an empty vessel, in which her words were free to echo off the blank walls,  
  
"Rogue you shouldn't have done that!" Jean's voice. He couldn't see her but he could sense her physic presence. What had Rogue done? He couldn't think, couldn't remember. He knew who the voices belonged to but he didn't know why he knew them, where was he? Somewhere soft. Not a bed. Not a sidewalk. Was he dead? Maybe he had been shot down by.by.by an enemy. He had enemies, lots of enemies. Why? He tried to think but he just plunged further and further into a black ocean. He was being rocked back and forth in waves of nothingness. Remy knew that his whole life he wanted to forget his past. Wanted to be different. Wanted it change. But what wouldn't he give to just remember anything. Then he knew he was moving.  
  
Slowly it was coming back. Thoughts were leaking into his ears, like the echoing voices of his teammates. That's how he knew them. They were X- men. So was he. Right? He was an X-man? Right.  
  
Scott was talking. "Nothing like this was supposed to happen! I should have stopped them I just thought Rogue was smarter then that. Holy Jeez Proffesor Xavier is going to kill me!" Proffesor Xavier? Proffesor X? Bald guy, wheelchair, heavy eyebrows and.and a mustache? No.the mustache was someone else, someone with a stick. Someone.Papa? Right. Jean- Luc.Pricard.No LeBeau.  
  
"Right and your taking the full blame. I didn't have anything to do with this." Jean again. He could feel two fingers on his neck. The first thing he had felt in a long time. In an eternity. Since. arms? Arms around his neck? Someone else's lips on his own. Pain. Rogue. Right. That wave was successfully ridden out, but then just as one was concurred another swelled up behind. How did he know Rogue? Who was she? The River Rat.  
  
"Your lucky he's still alive." A new voice, even newer then the others. Totally different. No physic presence obviously not Jean, but still a woman. 'Ro. No. Annie. Right? He didn't know Annie all that well. He couldn't even remember who Annie was.  
  
"Ew! I hate needles." It was Kitty again. Then he felt a little prick. Obviously the needle Kitty hated. But why? "Obviously your friend doesn't." Annie again. What was she talking about? Needles, before. He was lost.  
  
"I remember when he got that." Ororo. That was her, the Egyptian born car- jacker who.who he knew before. He didn't know how. He didn't know why. When he got what? He could hear the dings, clicks, and the other famous sound effects of a hospital. Time was passing so quickly now, as he fought to steady his mind, as he fought to answer all of those questions that were laid in front of him.  
  
"He'll be fine," that was Annie. "Stop checking up on him already!" He knew he would be fine. Not even Rogue could keep the Gambit down. Where was Rogue? He wanted to know. Remy remembered her kissing him. He could remember the way her lips felt against his own. He could remember her arms wound around his neck and he remembered how natural that had felt. How good it felt. How perfect it had felt. How.God. She was alone somewhere now. With memories that he could remember, and remember why he wanted to forget. He had been lying there for what felt like days. Maybe even weeks. She needed him. Rogue.  
  
"Rogue," his voice. His words. He found his voice but it was tiny like that of a dying man. His eyes jerked open. Blurry. Nothing was clear. Nothing made sense. The foggy shapes began to weave in and out of focus people were standing around him.  
  
"He's really okay!" Storm looked happy. She bent down and hugged her friend. "It's been almost three days, I didn't think you were really going to come to."  
  
"Where's--" he began, but Logan cut him off.  
  
"Damn, if he died I woulda gotten his motorcycle. Oh well, good ta have ya' back, Gumbo."  
  
"R--" Again he was cut short, this time by Kitty.  
  
"You should talk to Scott: he's being all leadery and taking on himself."  
  
"Where's the--" Yet again he was cut short. Now he knew how Phoenix felt.  
  
"Jeez, can't you guys tell he's trying to talk?" said Bobby, throwing his arms out. Steam spiraling from his mouth as usual.  
  
"T'ank you, where de 'ell is Rogue?" Gambit asked, his voice steadily becoming stronger. 


	4. are we a couple?

A/N: Sorry it took me so long to update, I had writer's block for one and since Winter Brake is coming up my teachers are piling on the homework. Isn't High School wonderful?  
  
"Rogue," Remy was speaking. Rogue looked up from her lap, she had been replaying the moment in the Danger Room over and over again in her head. She tried not to think of the painful memories that she now shared with Remy. The others didn't move they were still in her way she couldn't see him. "Where's" his voice grew in volume and speed, it wasn't anywhere near his usual astounding speed or the auditorium filling volume, but his voice was coming back to it.  
  
Wolverine looked aggravated and lit a cigar, "Damn, if he had died I woulda gotten his motorcycle. Oh well, good ta have ya' back, Gumbo." He puffed the cigar. Rogue knew he was lying, and she also knew how much Remy loved the red and black motorcycle that was sitting now in the garage.  
  
"R--" his voice was still elevating, but it was still haggard, as if he had run a mile or so.  
  
"You should talk to Scott, he's being all leadery and taking it out on himself," Kitty nodded. Scott was still walled up in his room saying things like: 'if this happens in the Institute think about what'll happen in a real fight.' And 'How could I let this happen? He's going to die and its my fault!'  
  
"Where the--"  
  
"Jeez can't you guys tell he's trying to talk?" Bobby Drake nearly shouted.  
  
"T'ank you, where de 'ell is Rogue?" He asked.  
  
"Ah'm here," Rogue finally shouted. The others slowly stepped to the side like parting waters. There he sat. For a second she just looked at him, he looked so sick. His skin was pale, not as pale as it had been when she had first come three days prior but he still retained some of that pallor. His vanes stood out as if they had all been colored in including two bizarre ones on the underside of each arm that lead to the center of his shirtless chest*. An IV was in his right arm. This was her fault. She had done this to him. "Ah'm sorry," she said slowly.  
  
"Don' be I guess I was wrong, y'all do know somet'ing 'bout a real fight after all." He joked, the ghost of his former smile crept over his sickly face. She was not aware of anyone else just him and her. She cared about that stupid, cocky, aggravating, thieving Cajun so much. She had hurt him extremely badly. She was unaware of the fact that she had ended up sitting on the foot of the hospital bed, but was fully aware of her decision to wind her arms around his neck. Tears began in her eyes and she hugged him making sure their skin didn't touch.  
  
Remy was hugging her too; it was comforting to be in his arms. No one could hurt her then. She held back the tears as she ran her hands down his back, until she found it. Her fingers had found a long thin mark, an indent, a scar, a scar that his own father had given to him when he was 10 and accidentally blew up a playground fence. That was when she let tears fall, when she cried. Cried for Remy, he had been through so much in his 18 years of life.  
He had seen children die for their father's fights. He had seen fathers and mothers snatched from their kids just days before Christmas. Remy had seen blood dripping into city gutters like floodwater. Gambit had fought his whole life in a war that didn't mean anything. Remy had run from the police. Remy saw corruption, he himself was corrupt, jaded, and lonely. He had heard more lies then truths, he had seen men bleed tears, he had woken up to hear that another friend was killed, he had seen a good man sin. He was taught to hate. But he didn't. She could see he didn't. She could feel he didn't. For all of these things she didn't pity him. Her emotion was hard to explain. He had been through all that; truly an amazing and good person and she had almost been the end of him.  
  
"Ah'm so sorry, ah could've killed you," she whispered between sobs.  
  
"Shhh," Remy rocked her gently, "S'okay petit, s'okay I'm 'ere now, I'm alright."  
  
She realized as she half lay there in his arms, how close they really were. They were closer then Scott and Jean, closer then Storm and Beast, closer even then Romeo and Juliet. She had been him. She had been in him. Three days ago when Rogue fought Remy's inner demons she and he were one. There was no Rouge, no Marie D'ancanto, but there had been a weak sliver of Remy. Remy LeBeau had been lying barely alive in the hospital wing, and he also been a tiny grimy gold streak through her mind. Between both the physical form of Gambit and his entire memory, his life force was within the school, and between both lovers. They were one.  
  
She gave a shuttering breath. Rogue laid her head on his chest using her hair as a barrier. She could hear his heart beating. It was too fast but was slowing back to a normal pace. It was reassuring just to sit there like that. It was perfect. She could feel his voice in his chest as he spoke, "Rogue are we a, you know, couple?" He asked hopefully, "'cause I guess ya' saw in my head an' all so," he was nervous. She was lying there in his arms and he was being, God there was only one word for it. He was being a boy.  
  
"Yes," she said laughing a little into his chest. She looked up into his face. It looked particularly pale because of the contradiction between his corneas and his skin. She could see the tattoo on his upper left arm that was less then one year old that she knew hurt. The King of Hearts, his trademark, an alias, and his tattoo. "Absolutely!" She slipped back into his arms. Neither realized that the others had left, or where they conscious the others had ever been there. Rogue could remember that moment years and years later. In fact she never ever forgot it. that was the moment both fell head over heels in love with one another.  
  
*Hannah has serious issues: I need scientific reasoning. Usually they are even less noticeable then vanes, but these are Kinetic Energy ducts. It connects from his fingers through his upper arm to his spinal column (which connects to the brain DUH!) okay PEACE! 


End file.
